Sterotypes

August 16th, 2010

School has just started again. Every year people change to fit the new stereotypes and styles. For example, the ideal hair style for African-American teenage boys this year is a sort of mohawk. And for girls in general, the style is tight jeans and funky hair colors.

Honestly everyone wants to fit in, or belong to a certain group. Some groups, however, act a certain way so other people feel like they have to act that way too.

When in reality, people will most likely like you more if you don’t copy their every move and mimick their personality traits. It is human nature to judge someone based on their outfit.

Sometimes people want to see the real you instead of the superficial you.

My friends call ACHMI TABS motto cheesy but I think its pretty accurate. Everyone really needs to be real and true and themselves. It’ll make the school year much easier.

And you won’t have up a facade all of the time!

-Chelsea Ward

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Tips: New School Year and New Relationships

August 16th, 2010

 

Starting college for the first time is exciting and scary! Besides trying hard in your classes and extracurricular activities, such as marching band or SGA, you also want to focus on establishing good relationships. This can be a relationship with friends or relationships with a potential boyfriend/girlfriend. But let’s focus on the romantic kind of relationship. Here are some tips for good relationships in college!

  • Be friendly-That is the first step to establishing any sort of a relationship! When you’re in college, you will be overwhelmed by the amount of new people there are on campus. Be willing to be friendly to everyone to see who you are compatible with. You never know if you will miss out on a great individual just because you were not willing to talk to them or be friendly.
  • Be more open to different things. Be more willing to try new things. Be more willing to be friends with people that are different from you. Instead of surrounding yourself by the same group of friends from high school, be more adventurous with your friendships and relationships. This doesn’t mean that you should start hanging out with a bad crowd. It just means to start trying new things in your friendships and relationships.
  • Be approachable. Don’t send out the “don’t talk to me” vibe. That is off-putting to any potential suitors or friends. Being approachable includes the first 2 tips: be friendly and open to different things. Don’t’ be snobby to people that try to talk to you or ignore their attempts to be your friend.
  • Have fun! No one likes a boring friend. Be willing to hang out with friends, whether it’s pulling an all-nighter with friends or partying until the wee hours of the night. College is about having fun (and making good grades)! Make the most of it (the safe way). Don’t be so serious when it comes to relationships–being so focused on finding a husband or wife in college. Be willing to date different sorts of people to see who you really are compatible with.

Remember that college is about turning over a new leaf. Most likely, people don’t know about your reputation in college or your embarrassing stories. So, since you’re starting off with a clean slate, make the most of it!
–
Sarah Tam

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All Girls Deserve A Great Guy

July 22nd, 2010

Okay so im gonna be real … I dont believe the old story that girls only love the bad guys, and nice guys finish last. C’mon honestly whats wrong with a guy that treats you well right!?! Dating is a minefield, THATS for sure!  So I came with up some tips on how to spot a keeper, and some warning signs to know when you ought to slip out the door and run for your dear lives ladies.
 
#1
He shows respect  for all women. Any guys who refers to women in derogatory terms is a definite no- no, as sooner or later he’ll turn that attutide on to you. However, if he is considerate to women in general, then he’s likely  to treat you well.
 
#2
He listens to your point of view and doesn’t talk over you. If he doesn’t agree with what you say, he won’t tell you you’re wrong, but will simply suggest reasons why he doesn’t agree. No good guy will ever put you down and continually tell you you’re wrong, especially in front of other people.
 
#3
He loves his mother but doesn’t let her smother or dictate to him. Any guy who is still tied to momma’s apron strings is not a good guy to date, even if he cares about her. Momma will make sure that you always come second best, as she wants to be the most important woman in his life.
 
#4
He likes you as you are and doesn’t try to change you.  If a guy tries to change you, then he is not into you as an individual, he just wants to mould you into his dream girl. A good guy is with you because it’s YOU he wants, not some idealised fantasy woman.
 
#5
You are not less important than his job or friends and he has time to spend with you. If he’d rather go out with his boys 5 times a week, and only squeezes you in once a week (if you’re lucky). Not a good sign ladies.
 
#6
If you have a crisis or major problem, he will come running to help you out or support you. Whether it’s a family problem or a domestic issue, whatever it is he can always be relied on to help out. Not because he’s ‘the man’, but because he genuinely wants to make things easier for you.
 
Well there you go! Six tips to know if the guy is truly a genuie sweet guy!!
 
- Seyi Aladebumoye

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Adopt-An-Area

June 20th, 2010

This year the ACHMI Teen Advisory Board was awarded Keisel Park for our location for Adopt-An-Area. On the evening of  May 28, 2010 TAB visited the park to clean the entire area that was granted to us. With the TAB currently holding 29 official members, this task was far from difficult to complete. Although this service only took a few hours, Teen Advisory Board members are currently setting dates to clean the park twice a month. Along with the Adopt-An-Area program, TAB members volunteer with other community services such as working at Auburn’s local Humane Society and Food Market. The Adopt-An-Area program is not only used to keep our community clean but it also allows the members to bond while we come together to help and support the each other while we achieving our goal.

Allysa Gentry

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Obstacle Course

June 20th, 2010

 

 

 

 

Recently, the Teen Advisory Board went on a trip which involved a variety of obstacle courses. The courses ranged from Swinging your team from one spot to another, to getting over a twelve foot wall, and even being elevated 35 feet above the ground. The obstacles challenged our team to work together in figuring out ways to overcome each obstacle. Once completing all of the courses, we realized that the steps we used to complete every challenge, are almost parallel to the steps people in relationships should use when facing their own obstacles. While our team was trying to get over the wall, we realized that we need to communicate about our strategy, and also learn how to encourage each other when someone seems to be stuck getting over the wall. The same should go in relationships. It is always good to communicate while in a relationships, and instead of arguing or complaining about when things look like they aren’t going right. Try being encouraging and positive about the situation, because sometimes the best way to get over any wall, is to build up the people you are climbing the wall with.

-Muyiwa Aladebumoye

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Happiness is Being Yourself

June 7th, 2010

 

Most people agree that teens are more often influenced by their friends than their parents. The strange aspect of this belief is that teens often don’t know how their friends are influencing them. Friends can really have an impact in making you feel good about yourself or they can really tear you down. I have recently noticed that some of my friends feel a strong need to be part of a specific group or clique. They are so desperate to be accepted that they don’t see that the teens within the groups are using their desperation for their own enjoyment. It is sad to see someone be willing to be treated badly just to belong. From what I can see some of these friendships come with a price. 

Happiness doesn’t seem to be achieved by satisfying your friends…the friends who need to be satisfied are more likely to be “soul suckers.” I need to feel comfortable with myself because I have to live with the choices I make and the words I speak. The only guarantee I have is that the only person who will spend the rest of my life me is…ME. So it is important to maintain some boundaries that safeguard personal values.

Research Tomas Paus (2007) in the Journal of Neuroscience reports that kids who are more capable of resisting peer pressure have more activity in the pre-frontal cortex (the thinking part of the brain), and in the part of the brain which evaluates social cues and movement. It seems that friendships meaningless if I don’t figure out what will make me happy in relationships. Being aware of friends who tend to be controlling and try to make decisions for you would be essential in becoming peer pressure resistant.

By making your own decisions about your values and choices, you learn to set-up boundaries for all relationships. It is important to take ownership of the decisions you make including: physical boundaries, emotional boundaries, what kind of language you use, etc. Start now by thinking about what healthy boundaries you want to maintain in your life. Don’t allow yourself to compromise core values that would decrease self-respect.   If your friends are true friends, then they will accept you and your decisions. Most importantly, know your limits. You’ll feel happier and respect yourself, and respecting yourself allows you to respect others.

As you make your own choices not only will you strengthen your brain, but you will make friends with people who are also strong. Being straight-forward about boundaries within friendships  makes it easier to make new friends and enjoy old friends.

- Corey Ketring

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Relay For Life

May 21st, 2010

The Teen Advisory Board attended the annual Relay for Life on May 7th. Relay for Life is an all-night event where people gather from the community to bring about awareness for the fight for cancer from 6 p.m. to 6 a.m. This year, Relay for Life was held at the Southern Union Community College track. Various schools, stores, churches, and organizations came and set up booths around the track, including live bands that played throughout the night. The most inspirational part of the evening was seeing all of the cancer survivors walk a lap around the track in a group together. As the night progressed, we were able to walk around the track and visit the other booths and mingle with other walkers. TAB passed out informational pamphlets and brochures about healthy relationships along the way.

I think the Relay for Life, started by the American Cancer Society, is a good chance for the cancer victims to realize that there their community is here supporting them. Cancer is such a horrible disease, and it is even more painful to go through alone. We rely on our friends, families, and significant others during these times of struggle for love and support. Even when we ourselves are not healthy physically, healthy relationships play an important role.

-Lara Tucci

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The Unthinkable

May 18th, 2010

    

It’s safe to say that everyone has a companion of the opposite sex that they remain close too, without being romantically involved. It is also safe to say that there is a reason that you are attracted to that particular individual, rather if it’s by looks or personality. There is a reason to why we stick close to the people we form these relationships with. That reason is strictly because we have found our comfort zone. But what if someone did the unthinkable and crossed the line that lies between being friends and becoming lovers? People tend to stray from this particular relationship in fear of losing a great friendship. Although it is true that just because two people can be great friends, does not mean that they will be great lovers. It is also true that the relationship built by your friendship has given you an amazing foundation for the two of you to build on. At the end of the day, all anyone wants is to be close to someone, friend or lover. In life we pick and choose who we want to remain close with, and once we’ve chosen those people we tend to stick by them. The reality of it is that no matter how much an individual is capable of hurting someone, the one that is still with you at the end of the day is the one worth keeping. A friend, a good friend, a close friend, will always be there for you at the end of the day. So this thing we do where we stay away from someone in fear of ruining a relationship is irrational. Sometimes the invasion of personal space from the person who knows you the best is exactly what you need, and sometimes it isn’t. Don’t let the fear of losing something so precious; keep you from gaining something that has the potential to be extraordinary. We shouldn’t give up on something before we try. But before doing so it is imperative that the two individuals communicate their feelings for one another before taking a leap that involves a change in status. This will allow security within the relationship and comfort in case the commitment doesn’t work. This will not work for every close opposite sex couple. But sometimes doing the unthinkable and going against all odds will enhance your life in ways you did not even imagine.

-Aiesha Gentry

 

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Graduation: The End is Near

May 15th, 2010
 
Graduation is not too far away. The seniors can taste it and its slow arrival almost pangs them; however, for many students graduation is a fearsome Armageddon. It’s the time when people begin to disperse and relationships end. A terrifying sign of the end of the world  as you know it. Yes, people will travel long distances and move to the vast reaches of the world and people will make new friends, lovers, and may even start families—these are all things that graduation leads way into; but relationships–amiable or amorous—do not have to end once graduation has passed.
People world-wide can stay in connected through Facebook, e-mail, and texting. However, nothing compares to being with your friends in person. So make plans to spend time with your good friends while you can. Especially people you know that you won’t see for a while like friends going to out-of-state or out-of-country schools. These memories will last you a lifetime, or at least until the first high school reunion.
As for romantic relationships torn apart by different educational pursuits, graduation doesn’t have to be an expiration date. In fact, I happen to know several couples that are still trudging on healthy and strong regardless of being apart. Personally, if you are going to try to make such a relationship work I think trust and taking time out to see each other is most important. Trust is important because you should have faith in your partner to be faithful while apart and taking time to see each other is important as well. Seeing each other reinforces trust, care, and its always something to enjoy. You can meet at half way points between your two schools or web chat in order to keep in touch. And, as always, communication is key; especially in long distance relationships so both people can understand where the other person stands. Without seeing someone for a long time, it is possible your partner might not understand the stress, pressure, and various other things you are going through and so communication is a must so that sarcasm or other irritations won’t explode into dramatic fights.
However, sometimes break ups may be a better route for some couples. It’s best to talk to your partner about concerns and the situation at hand and decide together what is best for the both of you.

-Teresa Henderson

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Left Behind

May 15th, 2010

 

Whats happens if your boyfriend or girlfriend is about to graduate the high school that you both go to, leaving you behind? They are about to go to college and be much farther away from you than they are now. This could either break apart the relationship, or it can make it even stronger than it already is. It just depends on the type of relationship you have now. Some couples just break up because they want to be single during their college years, and don’t want to deal with the stress of trying to keep up with their significant other that’s miles away from them. That’s your decision to make, but I don’t believe that is the answer at all. If you truly have a relationship that means something to you, then you should at least try to figure something out on how the “long distance” aspect is going to work. If you talk about what is going to happen and tell them how everything is going to work before you leave to go to college with the intention of making it work, then there will be way less problems. However, if you just try to “wing it” and see what happens, it’s most likely going to fall apart within the first week they start college. Like I said from the beginning, it can be a good thing or a bad thing. All you have to do is make the right choice by talking it out and everything else will fall into place. Everyone knows what can happen as a result of the choices you make at any time in a relationship. Making difficult choices is hard, so just make the right one and your relationship will be a lot stronger in the end. You can aslo  have much more fun with your boyfriend or girlfriend. This way, nothing can ever go wrong, or at least they go wrong a lot less often! Try this for yourself and see if it works!

-Baxter

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